// I moved my tootsies away from the fire right after taking this photo, don't worry!
I've been feeling pretty rubbish mental and physical health-wise this week but instead of doing what I usually do when this happens (which is nothing) I've been keeping myself busy despite being unable to leave the house.
one. This week started off pretty badly to be honest! Halloween was on Monday and my entire day (and night) was riddled with anxiety which wasn't helped by the group of teenagers that banged on my door whilst I was home alone and smashed the pumpkins on our doorstep when I didn't answer. I got into such a state that I couldn't take Leigh trick-or-treating so Luke took her for me, bless him. I spent my evening wrapped tight in a blanket playing Animal Crossing and trying to pretend the outside world didn't exist.
two. I still didn't feel well on Tuesday but it was my Nan's 7th anniversary and I wanted to buy my mum some flowers because she was sad. I reeeeeally didn't want to leave the house but Luke coaxed me out and we rode our bikes to the local supermarket. I bought my mum some lilies which have since bloomed beautifully and I also picked up some ingredients to bake my dad a cake.
three. I haven't baked very often this year because nine times out of ten I can't actually eat what I make and it makes me sad to have the delicious baked goods hanging around, tempting me. I was really in the mood to bake on Tuesday, though, so I grabbed a few bars of Toblerone and created a three-tier vanilla sponge cake. I made chocolate buttercream to fill and ice it but also added a layer of crumbled Toblerone between each layer. I've never iced a cake completely before but I think it went pretty well! It was so difficult to make the buttercream, though, because I can't eat dairy so I wasn't able to taste it myself. I had to rely on my mum's judgement, which I think she rather enjoyed because I was in and out of the kitchen with a bit of icing for her to taste every five seconds until I got it right.
four. Wednesday I did leave the house - I went to my dad's for the morning and as my little sister Leigh had an in-service day at school, she tagged along too. I was feeling v anxious and shaky but I wanted to see Dad's reaction to the cake in person! He loved it, thankfully, and inhaled the first slice within about 30 seconds flat. Later on in the afternoon we dipped into a few charity shops for ten minutes before we picked my brother up from college. Again, I was panicky af in the car but I coped pretty well, I think.
five. The past few days have been pretty boring in comparison to the rest of the week. I've just been blogging, doing house work and... that's about it, really. I'm not really sure what's brought on this sudden heaviness again but I'm trying my best to carry on despite it. I've been leaving the house for short little trips like to the corner shop, down into the woods near my house or to Luke's house which has been helping with the cabin fever, and I've been spending a lot of time in my favourite fictional worlds. I really hope it disappears soon because I feel a bit like I've paused and I'd really like to get out a bit more before I become a hermit again. I've come so far this year and I need to remember that instead of panicking that I'm never going to get better.
Blog posts this week ::
♥ Happy Harry-ween! | A spur-of-the-moment post sharing mine and my family's attempts at pumpkin carving this year.
♥ End of Year Goals | A list of 16 things I hope to achieve before the end of the year.
♥ VX Cafe, Bristol | I mentioned in my last Sunday Post that I'd been to a vegan café for cake and coffee and it was so good I threw together an entire post on it!
♥ On Self-Love and My New Hogwarts House | As requested by you lovely lot on Twitter, I shared some musings on my recent Hogwarts House swap-over and what it meant for me in terms of self-exploration.
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I think you've coped really well this week and should def keep focusing on the positives, I too have to take each day as it comes and do my best to motivate myself and keep busy because even if you achieve something small it's better than nothing :) and your cake looked delicious! Xx
ReplyDeleteEXACTLY - Focus on what you have achieved. Seeing g that you got out later in the week really put a smile on my face; yes, there was anxiety, but you DID it and that is what matters xxxxx
ReplyDeleteIt looks like you had a cosy week, minus the anxiety. I know how you feel, It's horrible not being able to leave the house. I hope you're feeling better.
ReplyDeleteMelissa.XX
www.blessthegarden.co.uk
I hope things get better for you lovely! I also had a pretty hard week mental health wise, 8; you ever need to chat you know where to find me xxx
ReplyDeleteThrifty vintage fashion
Sorry to hear you've not been feeling good this week, but sounds like you've been doing all the right things to make yourself feel better. That cake looks delicious, baking makes me feel calm and it is always nice making something for someone else. :)
ReplyDeletewww.bethanlikes.com
I think you've coped really well, especially by not returning to your old ways. That's really hard not to do when things aren't going so well, so well done you! Those trick or treaters sound like absolute b******s. :( x www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x
ReplyDeleteI think you managed to deal with Halloween really well, trick or treaters are a nightmare for anxiety suffers but baking and keeping yourself busy is the way forward. That cake really does look amazing, especially second time round! :) xx
ReplyDeleteYasmina | The July Journal