Grab some snacks and get comfy pals, this is gonna be a long one!
one. This week began very emotionally. It was time for my family holiday, the one that we had had planned since January. We were going to spend four nights and five days together in Brean, which is one of my favourite places, but sadly I had to come home early. I'm going to spare you all of the details but I was just so tired after enduring panic attacks and constant anxiety that after two days I accepted that I'd tried my best but had had enough and came home. I thought that I'd feel upset about it or like I'd failed but I know that I achieved more than I thought I was capable of within those two days and that it was an act of true self-care to decide to come home. I was considering missing the holiday altogether at one point, so the fact that I tried is a huge deal for me and it's something I'm really proud of. It also meant I was there for my sister's very first holiday, even if it was only for a short time.
two. SO. The Cursed Child, eh?! If you've read it, what did you think about it? I quite liked it, actually. I had hideously low hopes for it and I think because of that it meant I enjoyed it a lot more, as there wasn't really any room for me to be disappointed. I would have definitely preferred The Cursed Child to be the 8th book by JK Rowling but I'm okay with it as a play. I'm glad we were able to explore Harry's relationship with Albus, and also Albus's relationship with Scorpius (who, btw, is my favourite character!). Ron's portayal didn't sit right with me, I feel like they made him unnecessarily stupid, and the entire plot seemed a bit random and thrown together but I can't complain!
three. I hate to be this person (kind of) (not really) but I am so ready for Autumn, guys. I mean, this Summer hasn't even been much of a Summer but I'm more than ready for it to just give up trying and to let the brisk breezes flit back into my life. I miss cosy evenings playing board games, dog walks wearing layers of snuggly knitwear, Lush baths, hot chocolates, The Great British Bake Off and the palpable buzz of festivity in the air. I always feel much more myself in the Autumn and I find the darkening evenings comforting.
four. Speaking of comfort, shout out to my favourite blogs Daisybutter and Vivatramp for helping me endure this messy, emotional week. I spent the entirety of Sunday evening and Monday afternoon reading through their archives and it was a welcome and happy distraction from whatever craziness was going on with my mind/body.
five. I've been feeling all kinds of inspired recently and it's really given me a boost. After the discovery of a few new-to-me blogs (post coming Tuesday!) and the aforementioned scrolling of the archives, I rediscovered my passion for lifestyle blogging. For the longest time I've wanted to spin What Lauren Did Today back towards its messy, diary-like roots and I feel like I've finally found the inspiration and inclination to do so. I want to treat this blog like an online scrapbook and to share things as and when they happen. I'm going for a whole new vibe in my life at the moment and I want this blog to reflect that.
six. I also feel very creatively inspired at the moment. There are a few little projects that I've been wanting to start up for the longest time but I keep putting them off. I have a real fear of creative failure and hold myself to such a high standard that I don't allow myself to try for fear of messing up or embarrassing myself, so of course I'm going to go against all that and just try anyway. Who knows, maybe nothing will come of this, but I'll keep you guys posted! (:
I think when you're anxiety strikes so bad it is the best thing to go home and be comfortable, you should be so proud of yourself for even spending two days there, if that was me I would have had to go home straight away. I am also so ready for autumn now, I need a routine again and can't wait for those cooler, darker nights and yesss Bakeoff! Glad you're feeling better and loads more creative, I always feel like that after a bad bought of anxiety and it allows you to look at it a little bit more positively!
ReplyDeleteMarbl☾☽Moon
Thank you! I feel like I made the right decision by leaving but I'm glad I endured it for as long as I did! & yessss I can't wait for cosy nights in watching the Bake Off <3
DeleteI'm sorry you've had such a tough week, but it sounds like you had some lovely stuff (and lovely people) to cheer you up. I'm ready for Autumn too, usually I love summer, but this year it's been so hit and miss, I'm sick of going out in a dress and freezing, then going out in jeans and baking - make your mind up weather! And the Bake Off - can't WAIT for that, of course.
ReplyDeleteHope this week is better for you :)
Lyndsay | Fizzy Peaches Travel & Lifestyle Blog
Thank you! & aaahh yes I feel you with the weather/clothing situation. I'm looking forward to it being reliably cold so I can wear tights and cardigans again! x
DeleteHi, I am know how hard it is to say you've had enough. So I am so proud of you for knowing your limits, but still going out and giving it a good go! I am so excited for autumn too. I also just found your blog and love your writing style, so excuse me as I read all your other posts!
ReplyDeletewww.ashwinnie.com
Thank you so so much! <3
DeleteGood luck with your creative ventures. I think you did really well to go on holiday, even if you didn't stay the whole time! I am totally with you on not being able to wait for Autumn now either! x www.aimeeraindropwrites.co.uk x
ReplyDeleteThank you Aimee! xx
DeleteI can't wait for autumn either! Cozy cardigans and boots! The heat is just too much for me to handle! I recently found your blog and I'm obsessed with it! ♥
ReplyDeletewww.mooeyandfriends.blogspot.com
Oh gosh thank you! xx
DeleteI am SO proud of you for this two days, mostly that YOU can be proud of yourself! I just went on holiday for a week and feel completely drained getting back; i am my own worst critic, but reading this has encouraged me to reflect more positively on the whole experience. Thank-you.
ReplyDeleteI love your style of blogging and that description of a scrapbook is wonderful! Sending big hugs your way from a fellow Bristol girl :)
Bumble and Be
Thank you so much Sophie! I'm so glad that this post has been able to comfort you, even if it's in a small way.
DeletePS: YAY Bristol! <3